14 Moms Share the Craziest Things Found in Their Kids’ Pockets

14 Moms Share the Craziest Things Found in Their Kids’ Pockets

You won’t believe (well, maybe you will!) what these kids have been carrying around.


By: Leah Maxwell

I wouldn’t say laundry is my favorite household chore, but it’s probably the most entertaining. Emptying my sons’ pockets before washing their pants has not only becomes a necessity (valiant are my efforts to avert another washed-and-dried orange crayon disaster), but it’s also good for a little thrill. What will I find today? Something mundane and expected like stones, Legos, or coins? Or something utterly random and mind-boggling? I once found a stick in my 4-year-old’s cargo shorts that was so long I felt like Mary Poppins pulling a floor lamp out of a carpetbag.

The emptying of children’s pockets is made up of equal parts excitement and trepidation, but hopefully even if you find something awful, it will at least make for a funny story to tell at their weddings. Or on the Internet.

I asked some friends what they’ve been (un)lucky enough to discover in their kids’ pockets, and there are some real doozies:

  1. April noticed a grease stain on her son’s pocket that turned out to be coming from a pat of butter he was “saving for later.”
  2. Diane found a melted Popsicle.
  3. Wendy found several cicada husks.
  4. Dalziel says she’s always finding electrical stuff like marettes, bulbs, and screws. (Her husband is an electrician.)
  5. Jen once found 17 (count ’em, 17!) toy cars.
  6. Daisy’s daughter wins the award for most practical: she had a tissue in her pocket. What’s weird is that she was only eight months old at the time, which might make you ask yourself, as her mother did, why baby clothes even have pockets.
  7. Anne has unloaded pockets full of multicolored fish tank gravel and baklava, although thankfully not at the same time.

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  1. Jayme found six different fortunes from fortune cookies, despite the fact that they hadn’t eaten Chinese food in months.
  2. Holly’s son came home with a starfish limb he’d found in the sandbox at school. They had to get the local natural history museum involved to help ID it!
  3. Casey’s daughters have been caught packing (a) a Pop Tart (fudge, to be specific), and (b) keys to a dealership car.
  4. Megan’s mom once washed shorts stocked with bacon. They went through the dryer too, and made everything smell bacon-y fresh for a while.
  5. Ginger confessed to accidentally ruining an entire load of brand new school clothes by leaving Silly Putty in her pocket when she was a kid.
  6. Jessica has found a series of single, lonely goldfish crackers.
  7. And the winner (or loser?) of the little game: Adrienne found a piece of dog poop wrapped in tissue, apparently saved because it had a piece of tinsel in it, and what kid can resist tinsel? Adrienne says: “The child in question believed it had value. The mother in question was unconvinced. The dog was neutral on the matter.”

I haven’t found anything outrageous in my sons’ pockets in a while -- it’s mostly just bottle caps, sequins, loose change, bits of ribbon and string, guitar picks, sticks, and rocks -- but maybe you have.

What’s the craziest thing you’ve found in your kids’ pockets?



Leah Maxwell is a book editor, freelance writer, cereal addict, wife, and mom to two small boys. She has been blogging at A Girl and Boy since 2003.

Image ©iStock.com/Cathy_Britcliffe

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Jsrmom3 that can't have been comfortable for him! How on earth did he manage that?

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jsrmom3

jsrmom3

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When my son was 5, I found a handful of playground gravel in the pockety-flap thing on the front of his underwear. No idea how it got there!

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Freckart

Freckart

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When my son was younger Id find random things from school (broken crayons, putty to stick posters on walls, rocks, ect). The worse faze was when hed bring "cool" bugs home for me manily worms & grasshopers! Always a wonderful suprise when cleaning pockets. Thank God for little boys!!

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Over the course of a year I have found and started keeping all the rocks I have found in my sons pockets. We now have three flower pots and two large jars full of rocks collected from driveways and parking lots and anywhere else a boy can find rocks. I intend to do some project with them to give him when he is grown, perhaps for his highschool graduation.

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My son loved to carry M&M's in his pocket. While visiting my parents in the Black Hills in SD we had to clear out several deer droppings from his pants pockets. I'm sure if he thought they were M&M's he only ate one!

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