I Had the Perfect ‘Babymoon’ … With My Toddler!

I Had the Perfect ‘Babymoon’ … With My Toddler!

One mom finds out how changing her perspective can make all the difference.


By: Nicole Fabian-Weber

My husband recently went out of town for a week on business, and being that I’m 7 1/2 months pregnant and have a 2 1/2-year-old, I wouldn’t exactly say I was psyched to see him go. He’s gone away before for work, and although my daughter and I certainly miss him, we’re always fine without him. I knew this would be different, though – this time, there was the whole massively pregnant thing, and riding solo with a tantruming, demanding toddler is a far cry from being alone with a 16-month-old baby, which was her age the last time he was away.

Not gonna lie, things started out rough this go ‘round. On Day 1, my daughter decided that getting up an hour earlier than usual seemed like a fantastic idea -- and continued this trend for the week. Normally, it wouldn’t be that big of a deal (no, it wouldn’t be awesome), but the fact that she was also going to bed an hour later as well -- because it was hard to get dinner, bath, etc. done on time on my own -- made for a slightly irritating situation. Then there was the fact that, since she was getting less sleep every night, she was cranky -- and that’s never any fun, now is it?

But on Day 3, I realized something: This was precious alone time I had with my baby girl before her sibling arrives. It was time I would never, ever get back and wouldn’t otherwise have had if my husband hadn’t gone away. Yes, there were stressful aspects to it, but did I really want to spend these fleeting days being frustrated and annoyed when it could be a truly memorable week? Who cares if we both were a little tired and cranky? I wanted to turn this into something fun, something we’d always remember. I didn’t want to squander this opportunity.

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After making that realization and changing my perspective, the remaining days my daughter and I were alone together had a completely different feel. There were still meltdowns and early wake-up times, but instead of sighing every time things didn’t go as planned, I just went with it because I didn’t want anything to taint our vacation together, or our babymoon, as I began calling it.

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One day we went to the local pool in the evening, then changed into dresses and went out for a fancy dinner of grilled cheese and fries. Another night we got frozen yogurt much later than my husband and I normally would allow. And, instead of plopping my daughter in the cart at the grocery store and getting the shopping done quickly, I let her push one of those mini “customer in training” carts -- it took us about 14 hours to buy five things, but she had a blast. We took baths and showers together and I even let her watch a little bit of Frozen. It wound up being one of the best weeks of my -- and I’m assuming, my daughter’s -- summer. I truly feel like I soaked up every bit of her that week.

I’ve only got a few weeks to go until baby no. 2 gets here, and I’ve made a secret promise to myself to remember that week during the early throes of newborn-dom. Not just because it was such a special time but also because simply changing my perspective made a world of difference on how things went. That sounds like good advice for when you’re up at 3 a.m. with a crying baby, no?

Of course, whether I’ll be able to heed that advice in the middle of the night is another story.

Did you do anything special with your older kid(s) before a new baby arrived?



Nicole Fabian-Weber is the mama to a sweet toddler girl (with a boy on the way!). She lives outside of NYC and writes for The Stir and numerous other online publications.

Image ©iStock.com/byryo

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