15 ‘Bad’ Working Moms Confess What They Really Think About SAHMs

15 ‘Bad’ Working Moms Confess What They Really Think About SAHMs

Is work a daily grind or a welcome break from parenting? Working moms tell all!


By Wendy Robinson

This morning was a typical one in my household. I woke up late and rushed to get in the shower and get dressed for work. As I dressed, my 3-year-old came over and wiped her sticky jam face on my trousers and declared, “You no go to work today. I miss you too much.”

Sigh.

The thing is that I work for a lot of reasons, not the least of which is that I like my job and am good at it. I’m also the primary breadwinner, so I’m the one providing the jam for the toast that my stay-at-home-dad husband makes them every morning. I’m proud of my ability to support my family, but I can’t lie, sometimes I do think staying home would be easier than being a working mom.

Now, I know that staying at home isn’t all bonbons and trips to the park, and I am definitely not here to start a “working moms vs. stay-at-home moms” fight, but I do think it is interesting to hear the brutally honest (albeit understandably anonymous) thoughts working moms have about their experiences.

1. “Sometimes I am jealous of stay-at-home moms, especially now that my kids aren’t infants anymore. I have to wear pantyhose every. single. day. I yearn for the freedom to be sloppy in yoga pants and a T-shirt!”

2. “My husband thinks I work until 5 p.m. I can actually leave at 4:30 p.m., but I use the extra half hour to read in my car before I pick up my kids from after-school care. I need some quiet time before I have to switch from work mode to mom mode.”

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3. “I supervise over 40 employees, and I still have a nursing baby at home. I am burned out on people needing me all the time. My poor husband gets very little love and affection these days. I’m just peopled out by the end of the day.”

4. “I like my job, but I am totally annoyed at the constant guilt trips I get from my daughter’s teacher about how ‘she really wishes you’d supervise on a field trip,’ or ‘Oh, look, your mom came to conferences, what a treat!’ Can it, lady. I’m doing the best I can.”

5. “I live in an affluent area filled with stay-at-home moms. I feel like the odd one out, because I’m not at all the classes and lessons they take their kids to. The truth is that we could afford for me to stay at home, but I don’t want to. I worked hard for my college degree, and I want to use it. Take that, judgy moms!”

6. “OK, this sounds weird, but my ‘bad’ mom thing is that my colleagues don’t know I have kids. I’m in a field where women can get ‘mommy-tracked’ and not taken as seriously if they have kids, so I just never mentioned mine when I started here. No pictures in my office, no skipping work for day care events, nothing. My kids don’t exist from 9 to 4, basically.”

7. “Every morning, I drive to work and pass these two women out for walks with their jogging strollers, cup of coffee in the cup holder. Every morning, I feel jealous of them.”

8. “I work in a dysfunctional office with a crazy boss. I HAVE to work because my partner is still in school, and we need my benefits. I 110 percent think staying home would be easier than being in this nuthouse.”

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9. “Should I feel like a ‘bad’ mom because I don’t miss my kids while I’m at work? I love them, obviously, but I also like having adult conversations, thinking about complex things, and solving problems that aren’t sibling-bickering-related.”

10. “When I got pregnant with my third child, we knew someone would have to stay home because -- hello! -- day care costs are INSANE. My husband and I made roughly the same amount of money, but my future earning potential is greater, so he won. Today, I’m on a four-hour conference call. He is taking the kids to the splash pad, and then having a picnic lunch. Hmm. I wonder who got the better end of this deal?”

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11. “I kind of feel like my working is a feminist issue. Like, I want my son and daughter to see that women can be bosses, too. I don’t judge stay-at-home moms, but sometimes it does seem weird that so many of them in my area have advanced degrees and aren’t working. Seems like a waste.”

12. “I tried staying at home and then decided I like it better when my boss is a grown-up and not a toddler with a poopy diaper and an insatiable appetite for destruction and crackers.”

13. “Sometimes I take my kids to day care, and then tell my work that they are home sick. Then I spend the next eight hours taking myself to the movies and out to lunch. Ahh, heaven.”

14. “My boss thinks I’m still pumping. My son weaned several months ago, but I still close my door to ‘pump,’ so I can have 15 minutes by myself to mindlessly surf the Internet.”

15. “I may have the weirdest working mom setup, and I am sure people think I’m a ‘bad’ mom for it: I drop my kids off at day care and then I go to work – as a nanny. I’ve been the nanny for a professional athlete’s family for the last 10 years, before I had kids, and the pay and perks are amazing. So, yes, I’m ‘raising someone else’s kids instead of my own.’ (Thanks for that sentiment, Mom. Grr.)”

Working moms, how do you really feel about your role? SAHMs, how do you feel about these working moms’ thoughts?


Wendy Robinson is a writer, working mom, and graduate student. Someday she'd like to sleep in again. She also blogs at www.athleticmonkey.com.

Image ©iStock.com/SelectStock


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