20 Stay-at-Home Moms Confess: I’m Going Crazy!

20 Stay-at-Home Moms Confess: I’m Going Crazy!

Spoiler alert: Nobody is staying home to watch soaps and eat bonbons!

By Wendy Robinson

The other day, I decided to play hooky from work to spend the day with my 2-year-old. We went out for pancakes, and then headed to the neighborhood park for some outside fun. As I watched my daughter play and chatted with some other moms there, I found myself feeling a little jealous of stay-at-home moms. Pancakes and the park? What an easy gig!

I made the mistake of sharing this observation with a stay-at-home mom friend of mine who looked at me like I was insane, and said, “Um, trust me … this gig is a lot more work than going out to breakfast and keeping one kid entertained for an afternoon. I don’t think you totally get it.”

The truth is that I probably don’t -- which is why I asked 20 SAHMs to share the real scoop on the things that drive them crazy about their job.

1. “I miss having a weekend. All seven days are pretty similar when you are at home with preschoolers.” -- Linnea B.

2. “I can never leave work at work. My job is 24/7. All the time. No sick time, no vacation time.” -- Matilda F.

3. “It drives me crazy that the quality of my day is determined by a tiny dictator whose willingness to nap means the difference between an hour or two of ‘me’ time and an afternoon of hysterical meltdowns. Toddlers are the worst bosses ever.” -- Jules F.

4. “What drives me most crazy is there isn’t a clear definition of work/home and working/not working. The work is literally NEVER DONE. And if I do take a few minutes to myself, I feel guilty for not playing with them and/or cleaning something or I feel like others would say, ‘You are on the computer AGAIN!?’ And I don't have co-workers. I miss having co-workers.” -- Tracy R.

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5. “I also struggle with the self-imposed expectation that I can do everything by myself, since this IS my ‘job.’ When I can't seem to keep the house clean or provide a complete meal for my family, I am sometimes pretty hard on myself. I know right now is a transition (baby is only 2 months), but the sleep deprivation makes me a little crazier than usual. And I might add, the 'man cold' has taken on a life of its own now, where I have never felt so much unfairness in our relationship. I'm sick too, I buck up for the kids, you should too. Geez.” -- Jennifer K.

6. “We do NOT get breaks. Hubby asked if I had seen some special on TV that I would really like, and I snapped back, 'When would I have time for that?' I mean, seriously.” -- Jamie Y.

7. “It can be lonely and isolating. Even if you have close SAHM friends, you don’t necessarily have meaningful adult interaction every day.” -- Alex W.

8. “Sometimes I feel really guilty that I am still paying back student loans when I don’t ‘use’ my degree for anything. I went to a great college and worked hard for a degree, and now, I spend my days wiping boogers off the wall. I don’t regret being a SAHM (most days), but I don’t feel like I am really using my brain much.” -- Clara M.

9. “I miss having a reason to wear cute clothes and shoes. I feel like it seems like I’ve let myself go but really, I just don’t see the point in investing a lot of time in my appearance when I am covered in playground dirt and spit up at the end of every day.” -- Marta H.

10. “Unless your workplace is super creepy, non-SAHMs don’t get touched all day long. I am so ‘touched out’ by the end of the day.” -- Emily P.

11. “Is being a SAHM a privilege? Absolutely. But just because it's a privilege doesn't mean it doesn't have its set of challenges. I am so tired of blogs or articles where instead of supporting each other, women tear each other down. SAHM, career mom, or hybrid mom -- let's support each other's choices, and knock this stuff off.” -- Melissa H.

12. “What makes me crazy is that there is no ‘me time’ EVER, a constant sink full of dishes, and no adult interaction. However, on the flip side, I love so many things about staying home, and they totally trump the hard things. I especially love that if I don't get dressed and brush my teeth right away, that’s OK!” -- Jessica B.

13. “Sometimes being a SAHM mom is awesome, and sometimes it is so darn boring and filled with repetitive chores and watching the same TV shows over and over and making the same lunches and wiping the same bottoms. I have a hard time remembering what day of the week it is when they all look the same.” -- Denise R.

14. “I just spent an hour calming down a hysterical 2-year-old who was mad because I can’t figure out what ‘juice cookies’ are. She wants them for a snack, and I’ll be darned if I know what those are. Living the dream here.” -- Ellie S.

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15. “I love my kid, but I don’t especially like kids in general. Being a SAHM means that if we want to do fun stuff, we often end up at places where other people’s kids are. I get so bored of talking about or with kids all the time.” -- Kelly O.

16. “For us, my being a SAHM is a big financial sacrifice. I’m tired of feeling broke all the time, and it drives me crazy that I can’t do a lot of activities that would be fun but cost money. Sometimes it seems like all the other SAHM are able to afford trips to the coffee shop and zoo, and I can’t.” -- Jessica D.

17. “It drives me crazy when other SAHMs are competitive. I don’t care if your kid is on an all-organic diet and only wears fair trade clothes spun from hemp and that you are an attachment parent! Don’t judge me for bribing my kid with gummy fruit snacks when it is time to leave the park.” -- Hollie C.

18. “I’m home all day with twin 4-year-olds who NEVER STOP TALKING. I’m a major introvert, so I’m going to go crazy from overstimulation soon.”-- Kirsten V.

19. “I like being a SAHM, but I worry that I won’t be able to go back into the workforce when the kids get bigger. I loved my job, and I hope I’ll still be employable after a 10- year break.” -- Desiree K.

20. “Last week my husband was out of town for work, and both of my kids got a stomach bug. I was knee deep in soiled sheets and pukey kids with no help. If I wasn’t crazy before, I am now.” -- Lupita M.

What drives you the craziest about being a SAHM -- or would, if you were one?

Wendy Robinson is a writer, working mom, and graduate student. Someday she'd like to sleep in again. She also blogs at www.athleticmonkey.com.

Image ©iStock.com/Geber86

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