I Wanted a Girl (But I’m Happy I Got Boys)

I Wanted a Girl (But I’m Happy I Got Boys)

One mom dreams of having a little girl but discovers she was meant to have boys.

By Judy Koutsky

I grew up in a family of six kids -- five girls and my little brother. I was surrounded by girls playing house, playing school, playing dolls. I was a girly girl. I liked getting dressed up, having my hair curled, and walking around in my mom’s high-heeled shoes.

Fast forward three decades and I’m pregnant with my first baby. I was convinced I was having a girl. I just knew. My sister and I went on a road trip in my first trimester, and I brought along a baby name book for the journey. “Just look at the girl names,” I remember telling her. It wasn’t that I didn’t want a boy, but I only knew girl-related things and so it seemed, at least to me, that of course I’d have a girl.

At the 16-week ultrasound when they told me the gender, I was in complete shock when they said it was a boy. I’m ashamed to admit that my first reaction was tears. A boy? What did I know about boys?

Fortunately, I had a healthy son and focused on his adorable smile, his soft skin, and his wonderful smell.

Two years later I was back at the ultrasound room. My second pregnancy was completely different from my first. While the first pregnancy was a dream, this time around I had morning sickness and spotting, and was diagnosed with gestational diabetes. Since it was such a different experience, I figured this time around it must be a girl. Again, I was completely shocked when they announced it was another boy.

Two boys for a mom who knows nothing about boys? I hate sports, getting dirty, and anything to do with bugs. But I focused on the fact that both of my boys were healthy, happy, and safe. And then a wonderful thing happened. I discovered I LOVED boys. Not only that, I was meant to have them.

More from P&G everyday: 8 Moms Share About Trying to Raise Boys and Girls Equally


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My boys, now ages 3 and 5, tell me how beautiful I am (“like a princess”) when I go out on date night. They tell me they love me, for no reason. They’re super affectionate and hug and kiss me often. And I’ve learned to like playing in the dirt, digging for worms, building block towers only to crash them moments later “for fun.” I now take my son to kindergarten soccer and love seeing his joy when he makes a goal.

One of my favorite sayings that I learned from my boys is, “You get what you get, and you don’t get upset.” I thought I wanted a girl to dress up and take to the ballet, but I can’t imagine my life without my boys. I love their high energy, their creative spirit, and their willingness to take part in just about any activity. People sometimes suggest trying for a third (“A girl, maybe,” they seem to imply). Even though I’m done having kids, if I did have another, it’s crazy to think, but I’d want another boy.

Do you think it’s very different raising boys versus girls?

Judy Koutsky is the former Editorial Director of KIWI magazine, a green parenting publication. She was also Executive Editor of Parenting.com, AOL Parent and BabyTalk.com. Follow her on Twitter @JudyKoutsky.

Image ©iStock.com/JaniceRichard

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