The One Thing You Need to Give Another Mom Right Now

The One Thing You Need to Give Another Mom Right Now

You need to hear it, and so does she.

By Jeanne Sager

I’m not very adept at taking compliments. I tend to break eye contact and shuffle my feet like a 5-year-old who just got caught with her hands in the cookie jar. But it’s when someone tells me they think I’m a good mom that things really go off the rails. I’ve been known to burst into a torrent of tears, the sort of crying jag that ends with hiccups and a pile of tissues.

It’s a good cry though, a cathartic one, the sort that makes me feel stronger at the end and ready to face the day.

It’s why I make it a point to say something along the lines of “You’re a good mom!” to other moms as often as I can, and for no reason other than the fact that it’s a Tuesday and the sun is shining or we’re standing together in a crowded elementary school lobby and she looks like she is thisclose to a meltdown.

We all know it’s kind to compliment someone else, but giving a mom in your life a quick “you’re doing fantastic,” is more than just basic human decency. In one survey from Redbook Magazine, 91 percent of moms admitted to feeling unable to ask for help when they’re feeling stressed out -- and 10 percent said they feel that way often.

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We take parenting seriously, perhaps more seriously than anything else in our lives – and rightfully so. To be a parent is to be responsible for someone else’s entire life, from their safety and security in the present moment to helping shape the person they will be in the future. Parenting is extremely personal too, which is why you see moms pitching sky high tents on the battlefields of the so-called mommy wars, fighting to the death to defend how they feed their kids or dress their kids, their educational choices and their sleeping situations.


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There’s no quick fix for parental stress, but studies have shown these kinds of verbal (or written) gifts can have the same positive effect as handing someone money and can make us more resistant to stress and disease.

And at the end of the day, it costs us nothing at all to give another mom the one thing we all want most: Permission to feel good about our parenting for a little while.

How do you compliment other moms?

Jeanne Sager is a freelance writer, photographer and social media junkie. She lives in upstate New York with her husband, daughter, and way too many pets. You can follow her @JeanneSager.

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As a lucky Mom, having always had my Husband by my side to reassure, to help figure out strategies to raising our kids... I REALLY AM IN AWE OF SINGLE MOMS!! So, I make it a point to let them know they are my heroes, and that these women do the impossible every day, and that they are WONDERFUL Mom's, STRONG women and DESERVE to be APPRECIATED as SUPERWOMEN every day !!! SINGLE LADIES, I salute you as the REAL SUPERSTARS YOU ARE!

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