Why I'm Vowing to Get in Front of the Camera With My Kids

Why I'm Vowing to Get in Front of the Camera With My Kids

One woman refuses to be the mom who’s never in photos, regardless of what she looks like.


By Nicole Fabian-Weber

If you look at any of my social media accounts, glance at the pictures on my phone, or scroll through the photos on my computer, you'll see tons of shots of my kids. Obviously. What you won't see in a lot of these photos, however, is me.

Like most moms, I'm the picture-taker. Often when something cute is happening -- like my toddler daughter cuddling my infant son -- I immediately reach for my camera. My husband, on the other hand, does not. It isn't that he doesn't want to immortalize the precious moment, it's just ... his brain doesn't work that way. Hence, me not being in a lot of photos.

If I'm being honest, though, my photographer's brain isn't the only reason I'm absent from a lot of pictures -- I also don't love the way I look in photos.

It's a cliché, I know. When I was in college and the years thereafter, I didn't mind having my picture taken at all. In fact, when I was in my 20s, I remember a friend of mine coming into my room with a video camera after I had just gotten out of the shower one night. I was in gross pajamas with wet hair and no makeup on, and I gladly shoved my mug in front of the camera without giving it any thought. The odds of me doing that now are slim. Incredibly slim.

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My mother was the same way. Always the picture-taker, never a fan of hopping in front of the camera. She passed away five years ago and -- you guessed it -- I wish I had more photos of her.

There are plenty of pictures of my mother when she was young -- when she and my father first got together, before she had kids, when she was a new mother. But, when she was older, when I was older -- there weren’t a ton of shots taken of her.

One of my favorite photos of my mother is one where she's holding a bottle of detergent -- yes, detergent. I must have been around 18 or so at the time, and for whatever reason, I called her name and snapped a picture of her when she was walking by. She's smiling in the picture, but was definitely caught off guard. Though there was obviously a lot more to my mother than laundry, the picture captured her perfectly: happily taking care of her home and her kids while surrounded by her family. Every time I look at the photo, I smile.

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There are, of course, the standard photos of my mom at weddings and holidays -- occasions where she was dressed up, and it's customary to get in front of the camera. But, those aren't the ones I cherish. I cherish the ones where she's an everyday mom, the ones where she's being herself, no makeup and all. Because that's the mom I remember.

I want to try to get in front of the camera more. I will get in front of the camera more -- even on the days when I haven't showered and I'm not looking my best. I want to remember these moments with my kids when they're young -- and when they're old, too. These moments where we haven't left the house all day, because we've been having dance parties in our sweatpants -- they're the ones I want to look back fondly on. But most importantly, I want my kids to look at my photos some day and see how happy we are.

Why might you shy away from having your photo taken?


Nicole Fabian-Weber is the mama to a sweet toddler girl and a baby boy. She lives outside of NYC and writes for The Stir and numerous other online publications. Right now, she’s probably fantasizing about sleep.

Image ©iStock.com/AVAVA


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