12 Household Items You Can Never Find When You Need Them

We’ve got a guess about where all your scissors have disappeared to.

By Leah Maxwell

We all know about the Sock Monster -- that greedy gremlin that gobbles up half of every pair of socks -- but what about all the other household items you swear you just saw but that seem to disappear as soon as you go looking for them? If you buy toilet paper in bulk, why are you always down to the last roll? Surely you can find at least one of your dozen rolls of tape. And what really happens to all the hair ties? Here’s our Most Wanted list of things that have a way of vanishing without a trace right when we need them.

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I can’t say I’ve ever had 10,000 spoons when all I needed was a knife, but I could write a heck of a song about having 10,000 AAAs when all I need is a D.

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Paper Towels

Riddle me this: If my cleaning supplies are always out of stock, why is my house still such a mess?

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Water Bottles

Yes, I realize I have a cabinet bursting with random promotional water bottles, but where is my good one -- the one that doesn’t leak a puddle into my lap?

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Yet another reason email is better than snail mail: Sending digital messages never starts out with me searching fruitlessly for an envelope and ends with me Googling origami instructions so I can make my own envelope out of my kids’ homework scrap paper.

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The way they disappear in my house, I wouldn’t be surprised to see one standing upright on its two legs and walking right out the door.

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Lip Balm

Are my kids stealing my tubes of lip balm and then snacking on them when I’m not looking? Seriously, where are they going?!

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Power Cords and Chargers

Behold the Eighth Wonder of the World: this gigantic rat’s nest of every cord known to man, minus the one that fits whichever device is currently out of juice.

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My kingdom for a lid that fits!

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Bobby Pins

File under Items That Are Everywhere When I Don’t Need Them But Disappear The Moment I Do.

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Notepads and Pens

Yes, that’s a grocery list written on my forearm in glitter glue. You got a problem with that?

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Kid Clothes

One day I expect to stumble into a vortex that leads to a land populated entirely by my children’s hats, gloves, and underwear.

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